I was once told I had never known joy in this life. At first I was offended. I thought joy and happy were pretty much the same thing. Just turned up, right? The definition of joy from my rather old dictionary: the emotion of keen or lively pleasure arising from present or expected good. Outward rejoicing, festive gaiety.
That last part- outward rejoicing, festive gaiety- hmmmmmm that gave me pause. I remember as a child having that orgasmic joy of curiosity, excitement, anticipation, exploration and just genuine joy in seeing someone or something that lit me up. I also remember being told to calm down, be quiet, quit acting like a fool. Somewhere I misidentified joy as an inappropriate behavior that only foolish people indulged in. Does that sound familiar to any of you?
Have you ever noticed how some people become very anxious and upset when children or animals become too “wild and out of control?” Have you been one of those people that had to stop the loud and out of control laughing and play, barking and running, or whatever exuberance was too much? Did it ever occur to you that that was the children being joyful, the dog playing and being joyful? When did joy in all of its glory become so wrong and inappropriate. How many times have you seen a brave soul laughing and dancing in a park, singing loudly to their car radio, playing with no care as to how they sounded or looked like? What was the first thought you had? Was it, “Wow, that looks awesome! I want to join them!” or was it more like, “I wonder what drugs they are doing?!” with an exasperated sigh or groan of disgust?
We have been trained and entrained from a very young age to turn down our joy so we are never too much. I for one am done with that dumbing down, shutting down my light so the “frumpy pants” people with the stick up their ass can be happy. I no longer care if someone doesn’t like me because I am too weird, different, and unwilling to conform to the judgements impinged upon me. I am willing to be joyful and let my light fill the room, the city, the country, the world. Would you be willing to let people choose to exclude you because you no longer cut off the magic and joy that you are- that make you different?
My invitation to you is to sit quietly with you and remember the child you once were before your joy was turned down. Be with that joyful orgasmic exuberance you were as a child and ask for more of that. Ask the Universe to bring people into your life that are joyful. People that would celebrate your joy and playfulness. Invite the energy of joy into the reality you would like to create beyond the reality you are currently trying to fit into. Choose to be joy, not do joy. When you do joy your are trying to prove what a joyful person you are by presenting yourself as joy based on the reference points and stratifications of this reality. When you be the energy of joy, there is no judgement, only allowance of you and everyone else to express themselves with “outward rejoicing and festive gaiety”! There is no need to please anyone or to make other people comfortable by dimming your joy. In the presence of judgement by others, instead of dimming down, turn your joy up. Be the invitation to break the rules and be more joy than you have ever imagined possible!
What would it take for you to find your joyful child with the orgasmic excitement, curiosity, and wonder this holiday season? As Gary Douglas once pointed out to me, “If you have ever had it, you still do. All you have to do is choose to be that energy again!
Shaman, Healer, Access Consciousness Facilitator